Conversation with a toddler


G’s laying on his belly in the tub, humming and talking to his plastic dinosaurs, which are also in the tub. 

Me: Hey, how’s it going? Are you swimming?

G: (looks startled)  You go away.

Me: You want me to go away?

G: Yes.

Me: What are you doing?

G: Nuffin.

Me: Are you playing with your wee-wee?   Yes, we call it a wee-wee.  Call me old fashioned.

G: Yeah.

Me: G, it’s okay to play with your wee-wee in the bathtub.

G: Oh!… You go away.


About Laurie

I have too many hobbies, but have finally learned (sort of) how to focus on one at a time and stifle my desire to add more. ;) I'm a mom, a wife, a writer, an artist, a seamstress, a gardener, a backyard-chicken farmer, a fundraiser, a movie-lover, a book hoarder, a junker, a thrift-store-shopper... I also love to laugh, make people happy, and take road trips. Some of these things make it into blog posts. I'm almost 50 and I'm still able to sleep through the night. I consider that a success.

10 responses »

  1. We call it “the sausage” or “the diddly” or “Mr Johnson” here at our house. Wee-wee. Ha. That’s so last year.

    And we don’t play with it in the tub.

  2. hahahaha!!!! reminds me of a conversation I had about a year ago with my daughter, except I had to tell her that she couldn’t use any of her toys when she -ahem – played. “What do I use then?” “Ummm… your hands?”

  3. My daughter’s step-mom caught her exploring and wrote me a letter, explaining to me that my child is perverted. Somebody’s perverted here, but it’s not my daughter. Good grief!

    We tended to use clinical terms around our house until our little boy started making penis announcements at church and stuff. “Hey, Mrs. Jones, do you have a penis?” Hence, my little girls had “bottoms.” And if a distinction was necessary, they had “front bottoms” and “back bottoms.” I figured that was all I could stand to hear in public.

  4. Hah – front bottoms and back bottoms.

    I had a friend in elementary who’s little brother was unfortunately tought the right word for his parts. If I had to hear that 7 year old scream “I’m swinging my penis around” one more time, I was going to chuck him out the window. Good Lord, I often wondered what became of that poor little boy.

  5. Make sure you tell that story the first time he brings his girlfriend over for dinner. Oh, and make sure you do plenty of crosswords between now and then so you don’t forget. 😉

  6. If I had a wee-wee, I would definitely play with it in the bathtub… and I wouldn’t want you hanging around in there either. Then again, if I had a wee-wee, you might be my kind of babe… in which case, I’d want YOU to play with my wee-wee in the bathtub.

    You know, I may have had entirely too much caffeine today.

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